My PoEmS...

My PoEmS...

	Daydreams... I sit and daydream... As I like to do During all my classes I can only think of you I think of your looks Though I know it's skin deep Then I recall your sweetness My emotions now steep How can I study Or even relax Without you interrupting My soul becomes lax I don't know of love Or how it can be I've only read of it's wonder In the books I read But if love is constant dreaming Of caring where you're at Hopeing one day you'll agree Well, I've already obtained that My Own Decite... My hands are incased in some strange disease No one seems imune, not even me Everyone I reach and touch shrivels and dies I am sad, I am worthless, in my own eyes While sometimes I pretend to be a happy girl I fool myself, fool the world Yet other times the desperate me seeps through I scare myself, and others too The one I loved vanished away Left me without a thing to say My thoughts some girl enticed him so The the image of me he let go So please, pardon me if I cry If I sob and sniffle and wave goodbye Goodbye to the old Jessica you had once known For I buried her deep inside, my poise thrown Now I am left with cold arms and strange faces None like the one I loved, my heart still races I suppose eventually I will forget this love But now my eyes will be wary and above Above all those planning to go and hurt me Because people are cruel, now I see So if the sweet Jessica girl you ever do find Remember, she�s soft, and please do be kind Self Hate... Does no one care about me at all? Is my place in the world too puny, too small? I am negleced in whatever I do So don�t be suprised if I snap at you My heart is heavy and my soul is lax Filling up with self pity to the max I listen to others, do they listen to me? No, obviously they�re where they want to be So my face is a mask of lies and hate Though I try to break away, and my mind can not wait But when I try to push through this case All this cruelty is thrown back into my face So, when I�m mean and you can�t see to break through Remember, one day you could be in my position too. Heart Burn... One day I decided to look in my yearbook, And gaze form page to page When suddenly my hand stops cold Of course, they�d say it�s just a stage. Because there is the picture of my dear sweet friend Maybe more than a friend to me And I miss him so my heart burns inside My vision blurrs and I cannot see. My palm slowly travel to my heart And I hug myself so tight For suddenly I feel cold and all alone A feeling that isn�t right. Dammit, I should be over this by now! But somehow I find I�m not I still cling to his sweet lovely face And find my emotions disraught. Will I ever again see a boy like this? All sweet, trusting, and kind? Or was he my only one hit wonder? My true sweet and gentle mind.

	Dark Angels... Crouching in the darkness Two embers glow bright And a thirst needing to be quenched As they linger late at night Turning their faces to the moon Lips crimson in the dark And place a palm apon their chest Shudder at their cold dark heart They whisper to the willow trees Secrets never to be told Seeking the ones with the purest minds To clutch in a breathless hold And the most dangerous are the very few Who ignore the elixir they crave So they turn to love to salvage their heart But the cursed can never be saved These are those who know no mercy At dawn they slink away And sit to ponder in their lair To plan for the next nightly day Dark Angels (part 2) As the sun sets down orange in the sky An old story remembers the girl Of nightly creatchers waiting in the dark Unknown yet to the world Of blood on the lips and nightly glory A death wish kiss it does seem Needle point teeth of predator wonder And that crisp evil eye gleam Murmers and whispers and secrets so deep Redding devil kissed lips Sweet dapple hair and creamy waxen skin Slurping those crimson sips Their courage is great but their fear is deep Under the beauty slapped mask Fear of blood flowing straight to the heart Something for most would ask The thrill of the windblown messages sent The charm of the endless hunt Souls exposed deep in the dark More than most would want Some are evil enough not to care Who they hurt or damn The innocent clever went out to fight But the smartest were those who ran The girl is a woman and the woman is old And knows of these ranvious feasts The world has been warned and is alert Yet they do not fear the beasts Now at night when you hear those scary sounds And you shrug without a care Maybe it wasn't that old loose shutter Just always be aware

	Whatever... Why do you call me such horrid names? Half of your come backs sound so lame What have I ever done to you? Nothing, nothing, we both know it's true What would you do if I ridiculed your cross? What would you make me do to pay the cost? If I dissed your LOVING God who ignored my pleas The religion is nothing but a hope giving tease And why live a lie of something that can't care? Praying to leave, fuck I'm going no where! But back to my point, why must you hate? Then you crave my anger, anger you create! Later, I lash out at those I love My anger, my hate, I bitterly shove Then again, this is what you want is it not? To put me in my place, emotions distraught You make yourself feel like a bigger man I wonder if it's GOD's never ending plan A plan to kill me slowly but sure Though a kind and loving soul you never were You're a joke and so am I What would you say if God was a lie? Well? What the FUCK I don't understand what's going on Obviously my outlook has been quite wrong I thought I was liked, was I deceived? Hurt in my eyes, just being conceived Now my only comfort is explanatory words Though when put together may sound absurd Yet they often depict how I feel Lately I can't tell the difference between false and real For things have changed to quick to see What the fuck is going on with me? How silly my words now seem... As I read them aloud, composed in a dream Was I ever important, as I thought to be? Or was this just more of your trickery I can sit here and tell you I don't care Tell you my feeling have gone no where But the fact is your apathy hurt me so My fucking feelings I can't help but show I could turn off my mind, my heart, my life But my own apathy would cause too much strife Truth be, this is becoming long and must end Oh to whom these words will I send? Just know, if you read these rhymes they are so true Thought you at least liked me, and fuck, I must like you! Hate... I HATE YOU I HATE YOU ALL YOU ALL SHOULD DIE SHUDDER AND FALL BLADE TO YOUR THROAT WATCH YOU CHOKE AND DIE DIE DIE GEE WIZ MOTHERFUCKER YOU BETTER STEP FROM MY SIGHT OR WE'S GONNA HAFTA FIGHT DO YOU LIKE THAT? I CAN NEVER TELL GO TO HELL I'LL MEET YOU THERE THIS IS A GAME I CAN'T HELP BUT PLAY I HEAR WHAT YOU SAY YOU BEST NOT STAY 'LESS YOU LIKE BLOOD? DO YOU LIKE BLOOD? CIGARETTE BURN MONEY TO EARN EASY TO STEAL YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT I FEEL THESE WOUNDS DON'T HEAL YOUR WOUNDS WON'T HEAL MY HEAD'S BEEN MESSED GO AHEAD ON YOUR QUEST YOU WON'T FIND ME YOU FUCK ME UP I FUCK YOU DOWN HOLD ME UNDER SEE ME DROWN YEAH YOU LIKE IT BITING MY WRISTS SWINGIN YO FISTS I JUST LAUGH YOU PUSSY MOTHERFUCKER THINK YOU ALL THAT BUT REALLY, YOU JUST WACK SO STEP CAUSE I WON'T PLAY At least not today... Dont't even ASK about that poem... i was just in a REAL bad mood one day!